Would you rather be right or loving?

Have you heard the expression, "Would you rather be right or happy?" Recently a slightly different question was posed to me that is much more meaningful. I was asked, "Would you rather be right or loving?" This is a much more powerful question especially relating to my relationship with loved ones who, according to my evaluation and my judgment, have an impairment of one sort or another. At one time I thought it was important, when dealing with a loved one who was on diversion after being charged with a drug offense, to turn them in after they had a relapse. This plan of attack was met with resistance, thank goodness. I did not end up turning them in, but the incident led me to start going to Al-Anon. It's taken me a long time to see that I was wrong. The reality is that I was unhappy, with myself, my lack of accomplishments, and my inability to financially support my family to my satisfaction. My personal insecurity, led me to be over controlling of my loved ones. I was so over controlling that I lost my ability to act in a loving way. It's taken me a long time to see this, a little over 17 years, but now I am in a position where I can finally apologize for my mistake and amend that behavior to the best of my ability. Twelve-step work makes that possible. I'm so grateful for 12 step programs and the outside help that's been necessary for me to grow so I can continue to be of more and more service to my family and friends.